My dog ​​is grieving - why? Empathy and strategies for owners

Dogs are social creatures with deep emotional bonds to their people and animal companions. When they experience loss, they often exhibit behaviors that we can interpret as grief. In this article we will look at how grief manifests itself in dogs, what scientific knowledge there is about it and how we as owners can act to support it.

My dog ​​is grieving
My dog ​​is grieving 2

(C) https://www.bluecross.org.uk/advice/dog/how-to-help-a-grieving-dog


Signs of sadness in dogs

Changed behavior after a loss

Dogs react individually to losses. The most common symptoms are:

  • Loss of appetite : Many grieving dogs temporarily lose interest in eating.
  • Sleep disorders : Restlessness, frequent awakenings or prolonged periods of sleep may occur.
  • Lack of motivation : Dogs withdraw, appear listless or show less interest in play and exercise.
  • Increased whining or barking : Vocalizations are a common way to express emotions.
  • Searching for the lost : Some dogs roam the house or garden searching intensively for their deceased companion.

Why do dogs mourn?

Emotional depth and social connection

Dogs have the ability to form deep social bonds. The loss of a reference partner – be it a human or an animal companion – creates a gap in their usual social structure. Studies show that dogs have high levels of empathy and emotional awareness. These skills allow them to respond sensitively to changes in their pack's dynamics.


How we can support grieving dogs

1. Maintain routine

Dogs find security in a regular daily routine. By maintaining consistent feeding, walking and play times we can provide stability.

2. Patience and closeness

Grieving processes take time. It is important to support the dog emotionally without overwhelming him. Sensitive gestures, such as frequent stroking or cuddling, can provide comfort.

3. Promote employment

New activities such as fetch games or learning tricks distract and promote mental activity. Walking in unfamiliar surroundings can also help redirect attention.

4. Support from other dogs

If the dog is well socialized, encounters with other dogs can be a valuable distraction. This should be approached carefully to avoid overwhelm.

5. Get professional help

If the dog shows significant behavioral changes over a period of weeks, a veterinarian or animal psychologist can provide valuable support.

Grief in Dogs - Diagram

Emotional Impact of Loss on Dogs

graph TD Loss-->Emotional_reaction Emotional_reaction-->Loss of appetite Emotional_reaction-->Sleep disturbances Emotional_reaction-->Lack of motivation Emotional_reaction-->Behavior changes Loss of appetite-->Decrease_of_energy Sleep disturbances-->Increased_restlessness Lack of motivation-->Reduced_activity Behavioral changes-->Search_for_companions

The importance of communication

Dogs are strongly influenced by the emotions of their owners. If we show confidence and calmness, this is transferred to the dog. At the same time, we should consciously process our own grief so as not to unconsciously transfer negative moods to our dog.

The role of communication in dogs' coping with grief

Dogs are masters of non-verbal communication and are highly sensitive to the mood and body language of those around them. During the grieving phase, the way we communicate with them becomes a crucial factor. Through conscious, empathetic interactions, we can help them overcome their insecurity and sadness.


1. Body language: A bridge of emotions

Dogs read our body language and movements extremely precisely. In grieving situations it is important to adopt a calm and open attitude. Avoid hectic or tense movements, as these could further unsettle the dog. Instead, targeted, calming gestures such as gentle stroking or inviting squatting can convey security and closeness to the dog.

Tip: Pay attention to your posture

  • Relaxed shoulders: An upright but relaxed posture signals confidence.
  • Slow movements: hectic pace can cause stress. Make sure you take time for your dog.
  • Eye contact: A gentle, non-penetrating look shows interest and affection.

2. Voice: A powerful tool

The voice is one of the strongest means of communication between humans and dogs. During the grieving phase, a gentle, calm tone helps to reduce stress. Avoid loud or sharp commands that could unsettle the dog in its vulnerable situation.

How you can help with your voice:

  • Calming words: Softly spoken phrases such as “Everything is fine” or “I’m with you” can have a calming effect, even if the dog doesn’t understand the meaning of the words.
  • Repetitions: Consistent and recurring statements create reliability.
  • High and low: Vary your tone of voice to convey joy and motivation. A friendly, slightly higher voice often attracts attention.

3. Rituals: Reliable communication through routine

Rituals give dogs support and orientation, especially in emotionally difficult times. This habitual “communication” through recurring processes helps the dog feel safe. Examples of such rituals are:

  • Fixed feeding times.
  • Walks at the same time every day.
  • Welcoming rituals such as a cuddle or playing a game together.

Symbolic rituals for loss

Some owners report that they perform farewell rituals with their dogs - such as burying a toy of their deceased companion. These symbolic actions appear to help the dog accept the loss.


4. Time together: quality over quantity

During the grieving phase, it is crucial to actively listen to your dog - through observation and presence. Dogs often express their emotions through subtle signals:

  • Soft whine: A call for attention or comfort.
  • Changed posture: hunched backs or tucked tails signal insecurity.
  • Search behavior: A sign that the dog is still emotionally “looking for answers”.

reaction to these signals

  • Active attention: React promptly and attentively, for example with calm stroking or calming words.
  • Play and interaction: Even if the dog seems apathetic, gentle play offers can help to gradually bring him out of his grief.
  • Patience and flexibility: Respect that the dog needs time and every dog ​​reacts differently to communication.

5. Positive reinforcement: trust through reward

Targeted reinforcement of positive behavior through praise, petting or treats is a valuable means of communication. For example, if the dog shows interest in food or returns to usual activity, this progress should be acknowledged. Positive feedback strengthens the dog's confidence and motivates him to return to his normal everyday life step by step.


6. Non-verbal communication: The gaze of the heart

Not only words and gestures, but also energy and presence play a role in communication. Dogs sense when our attention is completely on them. Through simple moments together - like sitting next to each other or being quiet together - we can express a lot without saying a single word.

Keys to non-verbal communication:

  • Calming Presence: Just be there without applying pressure.
  • Slow, conscious movements: Signal security and stability.
  • Breathing: Calm, even breathing not only calms you, but also your dog.

Communication as a remedy

During the grieving phase, communication with your dog is an invisible bond that provides comfort and security. By consciously using your body language, voice and rituals, you can help your dog process the loss. This sensitive interaction is a source of strength and connection not only for the dog, but also for you as the owner.

My dog ​​is grieving - important questions and answers

How long does the grieving period last for dogs?

The length of the mourning period for dogs varies greatly and depends on individual factors, such as the dog's personality, the strength of the bond with the lost companion and the circumstances of the loss. Some dogs recover within a few weeks, while others need several months to emotionally stabilize.
A crucial aspect is the support of the owner: through a stable routine, loving attention and patient support, the dog can find its way back to its normal everyday life more quickly. However, if the dog shows significant behavioral changes over a long period of time - such as loss of appetite, constant apathy or unusually anxious behavior - a veterinarian or animal psychologist should be consulted. Professional help can ensure that no underlying health problems or deeper psychological distress are overlooked.

Can a new dog ease grief?

A new dog can help ease a dog's grief in some cases, but this should be carefully considered. It's important to get the timing right. A grieving dog initially needs time to process the loss. Introducing a new companion too early can cause additional stress.
Introducing a new dog should be done carefully. Ideally, care should be taken to ensure that the characters of the two dogs harmonize. Taking walks together and playful encounters can help build the relationship. However, the owner should remain sensitive: a new dog is not a replacement for the deceased, but a new individual relationship. It is important that the grieving dog's needs remain a priority and that he does not feel neglected.

Can dogs sense their owners' sadness?

Yes, dogs are extremely sensitive to their owners' emotions and can sense sadness very well. Studies show that dogs can detect moods such as sadness or stress - often through body language, voice and pheromones. This ability comes from their close ties to humans and their co-evolution with us over thousands of years.
When we grieve as owners, dogs often respond with increased proximity or behavioral changes to comfort us or gain our attention. At the same time, our grief can increase its own emotional burden because it reflects our emotional state. It is therefore important to give yourself time to deal with your grief while maintaining a stable and positive relationship with your dog.

What behavioral changes are typical in grieving dogs?

The behavioral changes in grieving dogs can be varied. The most common signs include:
Loss of appetite: The dog eats less or refuses food completely.
Apathy: The dog shows less interest in activities that he once enjoyed, such as playing or going for a walk.
Restlessness: Frequent running around, whining or barking can indicate internal tension.
Searching for the deceased: Some dogs search the house or garden for their companion.
Changed attachment: The dog may increasingly seek closeness to the owner or withdraw.
These behaviors are normal and should be treated with patience. It is important not to push the dog, but to give him space to process at his own pace.

Are there medications or resources to help grieving dogs?

In severe cases, veterinary-recommended aids such as pheromone vaporizers (e.g. Adaptil) or dietary supplements with calming ingredients (e.g. L-tryptophan or valerian) can help support the dog. These products have a calming effect and can help reduce emotional stress.
Medications such as anti-anxiety medications or antidepressants are only used in extreme cases and after a thorough veterinary diagnosis. They are considered when the dog's grief turns into pathological anxiety or persistent depression.
Additionally, alternative approaches such as Bach flower therapy or acupressure can be helpful to stabilize the dog's emotional state. The effectiveness of such methods varies from person to person, but many owners report positive experiences. It is important to coordinate all measures with a veterinarian or an experienced behavioral therapist in order to optimally support the dog.

Summary: My dog ​​is grieving – causes, signs and support

My dog ​​is grieving, and this is an emotional process that poses challenges for many owners. Dogs, as social and empathetic creatures, react deeply to loss, be it the death of a companion or changes in the social environment. My dog ​​grieves when he loses a trusted attachment figure or animal friend and shows this through various behavioral changes.

Recognize signs:
My dog ​​is grieving if he suddenly eats less, appears apathetic or withdraws. Whining, restless walking around or searching for the deceased are other typical signs. My dog ​​may also be grieving if he becomes unusually clingy or shows changes in his sleeping patterns.

Understanding Emotional Depth:
My dog ​​is grieving because he has lost an emotional connection that provided security and stability in his life. This bond goes beyond simple habits - it is deeply rooted in his social nature. My dog ​​is grieving because he feels the change and doesn't understand why it happened.

How can I help?
My dog ​​is grieving, but I can support him by maintaining a clear routine that gives him direction. Fixed feeding times, regular walks and familiar rituals help him find security. My dog ​​grieves when he feels alone, so my closeness and patience are especially important.

Communication is key:
My dog ​​is grieving, but he understands my body language and voice. Gentle words and calming gestures can comfort him. My dog ​​grieves when I'm tense, so it helps him when I exude reassurance. Joint rituals or small games can also help to focus your attention on positive things.

New encounters and social contacts:
My dog ​​is grieving, but encounters with other dogs can help him distract himself and gain new positive experiences. However, these should be done carefully and at the right pace. My dog ​​doesn't grieve less when he's overwhelmed, so sensitive introduction to new situations is crucial.

When professional help is needed:
My dog ​​sometimes grieves so much that behavioral changes last longer or get worse. In such cases, the advice of a veterinarian or an animal psychologist can help. My dog ​​may also be grieving if health issues arise that should be checked.

The grieving process is individual:
My dog ​​grieves in his own way, and no two animals are the same. Some dogs need a few weeks, others months, to come to terms with the loss. My dog ​​is grieving, but with patience and support he can regain his emotional balance.

Conclusion:
My dog ​​is grieving because he feels the loss of a social companion or a stable relationship. With understanding, loving care and conscious communication, I can help him overcome this process. My dog ​​is grieving, but together we can find the way out of the grief and rebuild trust and joy in life.

Further information: https://www.bluecross.org.uk/advice/dog/how-to-help-a-grieving-dog

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